








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 628 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 298 matches | ||
| Wingman | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5656 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,188 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8725 | 41% |
| Smokes | 5296 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2222 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 4945 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,280,283 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 97 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ | 62% | 52 |
| #2 | Kiir | 59% | 199 |
| #3 | jccalvin | 59% | 49 |
| #4 | kvsseL | 59% | 78 |
| #5 | FavE | 54% | 263 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | InfernoCA | 52% | 156 |
| #8 | Behaartmed | 49% | 127 |
| #9 | Cr AiiZi | 47% | 133 |
| #10 | Bernd Blubba | 46% | 41 |
| #11 | ntouRage_ | 45% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FavE | 14 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Doktor JiJlius | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Cr AiiZi | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Kiir | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | InfernoCA | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FavE | 1049 | 0.21 | 24 min |
| #2 | Doktor JiJlius | 807 | 0.23 | 23 min |
| #3 | Kiir | 441 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #4 | ntouRage_ | 350 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| #5 | ツ | 226 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FavE | +2.51 | 87 | 66 |
| #2 | nKs | +1.98 | 78 | 66 |
| #3 | Doktor JiJlius | +0.90 | 67 | 79 |
| #4 | Kiir | +0.43 | 75 | 72 |
| #5 | jccalvin | +0.37 | 77 | 65 |





