








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5356 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 481 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 431 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 179 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 154 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 150 matches | ||
| Wingman | 129 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 105 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 91 matches | ||
| Faceit | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 79 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




184 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
19617 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 61,472 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 15743 | 26% |
| Smokes | 15011 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 18821 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 11897 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,108,445 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7043 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | andrea | 63% | 477 |
| #2 | z0rgan | 62% | 635 |
| #3 | Freya | 61% | 466 |
| #4 | ask me about my skogg collection | 61% | 495 |
| #5 | ⭕⃤ roach | 61% | 188 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ask me about my skogg collection | 61% | 495 |
| #5 | ⭕⃤ roach | 61% | 188 |
| #6 | mommy | 60% | 1548 |
| #7 | Lynndah | 58% | 202 |
| #8 | Caitlyn Kiramman | 57% | 202 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mommy | 220 | 0.0073 |
| #2 | z0rgan | 88 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | Lynndah | 63 | 0.0159 |
| #4 | ask me about my skogg collection | 60 | 0.0064 |
| #5 | ⭕⃤ roach | 38 | 0.0098 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mommy | 1563 | 0.05 | 41 min |
| #2 | andrea | 1555 | 0.16 | 43 min |
| #3 | z0rgan | 1042 | 0.08 | 26 min |
| #4 | Freya | 752 | 0.08 | 17 min |
| #5 | Lynndah | 628 | 0.16 | 14 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mommy | +3.70 | 80 | 40 |
| #2 | z0rgan | +2.40 | 77 | 66 |
| #3 | ask me about my skogg collection | +1.59 | 78 | 35 |
| #4 | ClaireBear♡420 | +0.97 | 76 | 54 |
| #5 | andrea | +0.93 | 80 | 62 |





