








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 225 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
579 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,008 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 527 | 26% |
| Smokes | 545 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 473 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 463 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $251,135 of utility $200 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 112 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ViTaX | 86% | 7 |
| #2 | NoxX | 79% | 14 |
| #3 | KoriFee | 76% | 17 |
| #4 | gh0st | 73% | 15 |
| #5 | genetix(67) | 67% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dake | 4 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | ナッシー | 3 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | Kolumbus | 3 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | AyKay -A- | 3 | 0.0156 |
| #5 | KoriFee | 2 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dake | 112 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #2 | KoriFee | 95 | 0.28 | 3 min |
| #3 | NoxX | 57 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | SirRaffley | 56 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | AyKay -A- | 56 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ナッシー | +2.10 | 79 | 54 |
| #2 | gh0st | +2.04 | 82 | 36 |
| #3 | NoxX | +1.96 | 89 | 71 |
| #4 | genetix(67) | +1.60 | 84 | 65 |
| #5 | AyKay -A- | +1.35 | 69 | 84 |





