








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 3 different maps



Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
56 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 265 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 79 | 30% |
| Smokes | 75 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 47 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 64 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,594 of utility $40 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N4F | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | HeavyGoD | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | ultimate | 100% | 2 |
| #4 | Guy Sensei | 100% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N4F | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | HeavyGoD | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | ultimate | 100% | 2 |
| #4 | Guy Sensei | 100% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Guy Sensei | 13 | 0.22 | 0 min |
| #2 | ultimate | 13 | 0.29 | 0 min |
| #3 | N4F | 7 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #4 | HeavyGoD | 3 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HeavyGoD | +7.60 | 94 | 67 |
| #2 | Guy Sensei | +5.55 | 85 | 74 |
| #3 | Noname | +2.37 | 94 | 79 |
| #4 | ultimate | +0.08 | 85 | 68 |
| #5 | N4F | -1.38 | 89 | 88 |





