








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1064 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 284 matches | ||
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4869 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,248 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9391 | 44% |
| Smokes | 5896 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2559 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 3402 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,493,918 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 309 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | koffe | 60% | 102 |
| #2 | ⓕⓘⓝⓔ | 56% | 81 |
| #3 | TT | 52% | 348 |
| #4 | Albus Doubledoor | 51% | 292 |
| #5 | nyu | 51% | 302 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ⓕⓘⓝⓔ | 56% | 81 |
| #3 | TT | 52% | 348 |
| #4 | Albus Doubledoor | 51% | 292 |
| #5 | nyu | 51% | 302 |
| #6 | Tirde | 51% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nyu | 12 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | TT | 11 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Albus Doubledoor | 9 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | koffe | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | ⓕⓘⓝⓔ | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Albus Doubledoor | 1505 | 0.24 | 46 min |
| #2 | TT | 1002 | 0.14 | 28 min |
| #3 | nyu | 814 | 0.13 | 21 min |
| #4 | Tirde | 276 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #5 | ⓕⓘⓝⓔ | 217 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TT | +2.19 | 77 | 75 |
| #2 | rsN | +0.89 | 62 | 73 |
| #3 | ⓕⓘⓝⓔ | -0.01 | 71 | 69 |
| #4 | Albus Doubledoor | -0.31 | 71 | 83 |
| #5 | Tirde | -0.33 | 66 | 68 |





